A new Life; a new Start

[Shadow♥-San]

A life that knows no bounds: Shadow Paw


Perhaps she never realized it. So long had she spent surrounded by a realm of solitude, content in her own world. Perhaps she never really knew, that their kind was meant to be together; to thrive together.Maybe it had just never occurred to her, that indeed wolves were meant to form packs, alliances, friendships and enemies. Had it really been that long? Had it really been that long since she had known what it was like to be in a working, co-existing pack? Maybe it was being in solitude for so long that had changed her, reformed her into the female she is now who, is so different from the young wolf she used to be. Years in isolation from the world have broken her down, made it impossible for her opinion on the world and others to be heard; especially here, in a place all too new to her: a place where she had only dreamt of in her mind, on those lonely nights under the sky-alone.

Her huge cold and unforgiving gray-black eyes would tell her whole story but those eyes of hers are like locked doors and impossible to open. They cannot tell you all the laughs she has had, all the tears she has shed, all those mistakes she has made that have killed so many. As much as she would want to show the world, they cannot see the pain she feels everyday, how she puts on a fake facade to manipulate others into thinking she was such a perfect, beautiful, and quite female . She can not show you her soul or her true personality for most advert their gaze from her eyes that are so chilling: pupils as black as her pelt, a dark gray surrounding the pupils which, begin to fade lighter and lighter the father from the pupil, giving her eyes an eerie illusion.

Go ahead.Stare. Stare into those gray hued eyes that where set onto her blackened face if you can handle them. Look into them and try to figure her out: her past, her memories and her soul. All locked up in those fearful eyes, not her heart or her mind, but her eyes. So little to be seen and yet so much could be said. But the thing is she will not speak of any of it. She is a closed book no longer wanting to be opened by anyway. This was just the way she is- so unusual, so beautiful, so small and lithe, shrouded in darkness protecting an eerie secret of some sort.

Long, slender, and sharp outstretched talons connected to small, dainty black paws clicked in a rhythmic way every time she took a step over the rocks . Muscles tensed and quivered under the black pelt with each short, yet quick stride. Her small black cranium moved side to side as she glanced around with no fear in her frozen heart, occasionally glancing down and seeing the remnants of a once gone pack that traveled through. Still, looking down, noticing all the cracks in the rock, where it was stained very lightly by blood and seeing that no matter where she looked there was no thriving foliage; she could only guess why. Inside she laughed in humor as she pictured wolves fighting wolves and how great it must have felt, each of them trying to live on, struggling to earn food from the carcass. Of course, that was just what she imagined and the most farthest from the truth possible. But she was an outsider, what would she possibly know about what goes on here? Absolutely nothing.

She halted quickly for she had run out of room to walked forwards. She was now, at the edge of a densely thick and black forest, leading off into the distance. A shiver ran up her spine as memories flooded back to her although the forest wasn't the one to bring the memories back, it was the slight sound of water in the distance. No matter how much she flailed and struggled, she could not get back to the surface, the current was too strong and she was being pulled down deeper and deeper. Her vision was clouded and the cold salty water of the winter stung every part of her body and showing no mercy. Her head shook violently from side to side, trying to erase the images of the past. That was than, this was now. Now, it was time for a new beginning. A new start on life where no one knew her- or her ways.

Eyelids came down, covering her eyes as she let her other senses take over. The night was warm, or the warmest it could get for early Spring, and the moon was was almost out of view as it settled over the horizon as it made way for the warmth and light of the majestic sun which began to turn the sky many hues other than blue. There was nothing to be heard for everything was so silent except for the rustles of leaves, the cry of some bird of prey, or some small animal running through the undergrowth. Her jaws opened slightly and an unusual melody poured out. It would have been beautiful if it wasn't tainted with her feelings of loneliness, her fears, and death among other things. She was a twisted wolf and her name, was Shadow.

Slowly she stopped, cutting off her melody and opening her eyes once more the world. Before she had felt so carefree and alive but now, now she might as well be dead. Shadow was confused, she did not know where she was, she hadn't been paying attention. Was the land under her small paws claimed by another? Did that mean she was intruding, that she was a trespasser. A slight groan escaped the small black female as endless thoughts and possibilities crossed her mind; she was not optimistic. However one thought slid into her mind- what if this is a claimed territory but I am accepted- that she had no answer to. All she could do was wait to see if anyone showed and if not- well she would continue on her way and maybe hunt something to fill her aching stomach.

[--> S u s a n]

((I shall jump in with my wolf Zerah ;3))

Z E R A H ---> Can’t wait forever.

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong
Who would have guessed it
I will not leave alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like it's not too late
It's never too late

He remembered this land. It was fresh upon his memory as he walked through the meadow. He paused, taking a look around. He closed his red eyes, yes, the memories were there. They were good memories. Filled with his childhood life with his mother and father and his siblings, sometimes he wondered where they were. Wondered if they ever stopped to think about him, or if they were so caught up in their life, they forgot. He wandered if his siblings had mates and children’s of their own. He wandered if his parents were together just wandering around, or if they were raising another litter. If he had brothers and sisters he never met and probably would never will. He didn’t mind thinking about the past, for unlike some, he had a happy past, a good childhood. Little drama, it wasn’t until he got older did the pain of the world weight upon his shoulders. Perhaps if he had known the signs of unhappiness and how it felt to be in so much pain…perhaps things would be different.

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it all around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late

No one will ever see
This side reflected
And if there's something wrong
Who would have guessed it
And I have left alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like
It's not too late
It's never too late

It wasn’t until after he left his family did the world begin to show its true colors and those colors were named Liya. Liya was different then most females he had spent time with. She was a free spirit, living in the moment, with ea bright smile upon her face. He had hung around her for five months, it did not take him long, to fall in love. She was so filled with energy and happiness that he couldn’t help, but smile whenever he was near her. Perhaps if he had read between the lines, if only he looked deep within her eyes, if only he asked, then perhaps she would still be here with him. Unlike his childhood, Zerah did not like these memories. Even remembering the happiness brought a sting to his heart. He did not have multiple heartbreaks that eased him into the pain, no, it was just one final blow – and that was it. He always blamed himself for what happened to her. If he had done something different, then she would still be with him, or at least she would have known that she was not alone.

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it all around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late

The world we knew
Won't come back
The time we've lost
Can't get back
The life we had
Won't be ours again

Then one day he finally confessed to her. They were lying under the midnight sky looking up at the stares, when he blurting out to her. He remembered to look in her face. At first a perplex look came upon her features, it was the closest time she came to a frown. “Why? Why do you want to love me?” She asked him laying her head upon the grass, looking up at the sky. He wasn’t sure what to think of this question. “Because I do!” a small smile came upon her maw as she just said. “Well, if that is your wish, but just beware.” She never told him she loved him, and he was worried that she didn’t, it wasn’t until later did he find out why she remained silent. That would be the last words that he heard from her. The last time he would see her alive. For by the next morning she was gone.

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it all around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late
Maybe we'll turn it all around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late (It's never too late)
It's not too late
It's never too late

She left without a word. He didn’t think much of it when he had woken up in the morning, but then as the hours began to stretch, he began to get worried. He looked everywhere, calling her name. He went everywhere and it wasn’t until a week later did he realize she would never come back. It tore out his heart. A pain that he never experienced and never wished to experience again, with a heavy heart he went on his way. It was a year later before he found out the truth. A pack who had had seen Liya on her last day of her life said that she killed herself. She was crying and pushed everyone out of the way and made her way to the forest. They tried to stop her, but it was no use. She managed to slice her throat open with her own claws…Zerah paused as he shook his head. He looked around him, he just realized he was near the river which ran a throughout, Nozomi. He soon spotted another female not too far away from him. A numb smile came across his maw as he made his way over to the river. He spoke none, for he wasn’t sure what to say….

“I love you, Zerah.”

Those where Liya’s last words before she killed herself.